03-17-2026, 03:10 PM
I completely agree with this - those who I may rationally know have proven to be there for me often are the ones that the persecution delusions hit the hardest. Believing that everyone else hates me/thinks lowly of me/I am just scum when compared to makes sense and doesn't impact much of my day to day. Something I just wave to the background of my acknowledged existence and move on. But when it comes to loved ones.. that is where I get tripped up bad. I second guess everything I do, everything I say terrified that I am scarring them even if I don't see it.
Maybe just the own media I have consumed feeding it, but the movies (ie Voices) where it shows the delusional person in an okay spot and then the "reality flash" where they are in a hellhole. I fear that type of situation but with my loved ones. And it is so hard to try and tell myself that it is all in my head when how I am experiencing the interacts is so painful on the regular when I am in that kind of state.
Maybe just the own media I have consumed feeding it, but the movies (ie Voices) where it shows the delusional person in an okay spot and then the "reality flash" where they are in a hellhole. I fear that type of situation but with my loved ones. And it is so hard to try and tell myself that it is all in my head when how I am experiencing the interacts is so painful on the regular when I am in that kind of state.